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Sex Camels

I don’t know if you guys remember this, but in the months preceding Angelina Jolie’s first lip lock with her Mr. Smith co-star, she was causing a stir over the fact that her life was a wee bit sexless. Jaws dropped as the news spread. How could this gorgeous babe voluntarily go without? How could any woman who exudes that much sex seemingly shun it? How could anyone who could have it all, at any time, with practically anyone, sex included, voluntarily turn into… a sex camel?!

For those few months Jolie was busy making “more of a saint than sinner” headlines, a number of my female friends and students were breathing a sigh of relief. Finally, they were not alone – and, not only that, Angelina had just made their long-term, voluntary bout with secondary abstinence hip and empowering! Suddenly, there was nothing wrong or taboo with deciding not to get a little sumpin’ sumpin’ and, instead, hold out for something more, and with someone special at that. Sex camels loved the fact that Jolie had just become the posterchild of women empowered enough to choose to refuse.

Now, few would fault Angie, or any gal for that matter, for trading in her abstinent ways for some action with heartthrob Brad Pitt. But given no star has stood at attention for a lack of such in her love life, since Jolie’s rendezvous with abstinence, a lot of women have, once again, been left wondering if they’re the only ones not seeing some action.

It seems that increasingly, at least in my social circle, more and more young, attractive, intelligent women (who aren’t virgins) are holding out on sex for extended periods of time. These sex camels have a number of reasons for this secondary abstinence, ranging from being picky about their partners to looking for love to being fed up with players to just wanting to focus on themselves...  With headlines always sensationalizing those having more sex or better sex, rarely does the media mention and reaffirm those who aren’t having sex, unless it involves a virginity pledge. Even the recently released National College Health Assessment Survey for 2005 gave us very little insight on who’s having sex and how much, simply confirming that college students aren’t as promiscuous as thought. (FYI, men and women both reported having had an average of 1-2 sexual partners in the last year.)

So given we no longer have Jolie under an affairs of the abstinent microscope, inquiring minds want to know: who is this sex camel woman? How does she cope with her sexless stint? What makes her so attractive to men and women alike? What or who will it take to break her sexless streak? And when she finally does, is she better about making sure it’s with protection? Is she likelier to use forms of protection that are meant to empower her, like the sponge, female condom, or line of Elexa condoms by Trojan?

These are questions to ponder as one of the most important dates of the calendar approaches. World AIDS Day is practically the only day of the year that makes it super cool to use a condom or other form of protection if you’re sexually active. It’s also a day that supports sex camels worldwide – because there are lots of them! I promise you.

National College Health Assessment 2005 Survey results:


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Any of my g-friends who go on hiatus from men and/or physical intimacy w/ the sex camel bit will tell you hands down that the only way they made it thru was b/c of their sex toys! It's practically the only way to cope, unless, of course, you prefer your hands. :)

I've taken a few 'sex camel' stints back in the day, and several of my friends have chosen celibacy voluntarily. One of my girls even made it to the 16 month mark!

How to cope? Does using your vibrator count ruin the sex break? I was just wondering...

My last "dry spell" was almost two years long. And, OH, how much do I love the term "sex camel"?! That cracks me up.

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