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Sex For Help: How Many Blowjobs Do I Owe You?

My toilet broke a while back. Well, the rubber flapper inside the tank stopped “flapping” and I needed to ask my boyfriend to help me fix it because I couldn’t hold the flashlight and unscrew the damned thing at the same time. I know, real sexy, right?

So anyway, he comes to the rescue and I spend three or so hours stressed and cursing while he very patiently helps me pick out new parts at Home Depot and also helps me install everything, even going as far as convincing me to change the flapper on my other toilet too because as he put it, “If one’s broken its just a matter of time before the other breaks too.” He’s really very sweet.

But at least 57 times during this ordeal, I mentioned to him that I owed him a blowjob for helping me. That’s 57 blowjobs! Not that I can’t perform 57 blowjobs, its that I say this a lot when a man helps me with something that I can’t do alone, because contrary to what I’d like people to think about me, I am not superwoman. My boyfriend and I laugh about it and even have rated some things according a sliding blowjob scale.

He had a great new stereo installed in my car for my birthday. That was worth 10 blowjobs.

He helped me sell that car after my accident in November. That was worth 25 blowjobs.

The car I bought to replace it needed a new shift boot and still needs the automatic mechanism for the convertible top fixed. I’m willing to get the kneepads out for that too!

It started as a cute and funny joke, but has now escalated to something close to the edge of disturbing. I’m addicted to it. Can a man not help me without my offering him sexual favors? I just love to see his face light up, like he’s thanking me for asking him for help. Is it some testament to my feeling like I don’t deserve help from someone? I need to get to the bottom of this as soon as possible since I haven’t actually had to make due on any of these offers yet.

The last thing I want is to fall further in arrears.

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Comments

Don't feel bad. What you are doing is helping your boyfriend spend the BlokeMiles he is earning (sorry, rather a British phrase) in the best way possible, although I'm alarmed you haven't yet paid off your debts.

Check out my blog - www.blokemiles.com, loosely based around my novel of the same name. It starts with the main character Rob assessing what he can do to earn blowjobs, so we're talking about the same phenomenon, except your boyfriend would be actively looking for ways to help you out, so he can reap his rewards.

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