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« Men Pay For Dates | Main | Sex and Violence? Isn't one Worse than the Other? »

You Watch my Movie, and I'll Watch Yours.

People like different kinds of movies. This I get. On any given weekend, there are a variety of film choices. And your first choice likely isn't going to be someone else's choice. And maybe not your partner's choice, either.

Enter compromise. With a few exceptions, I'm pretty open to seeing something I'm not really into, if my movie partner of the moment has a strong desire to see it. I know how much it sucks to really want to see something in the theater and then miss it. Hate that!

There are some exceptions. I can't really stomach horror movies or particularly violent movies. I've never quite figured out the appeal of watching people get brutally hurt. When I go to movies, I tend to get really sucked into the story and the characters (hopefully anyway!), so when someone's head gets chopped off, for me it's like someone's head just got chopped off. Not like, Hey, check out those effects!

Certainly, I can take the violence of an action film or the occasional war film, but horror movies and many of the newer films that are really pushing the envelope are simply too much for me.

So here's where we go relationship with this post. My strong discomfort with horror and extreme violence has been used against me in just about every relationship I've ever been in. Because you take turns, right? Give and take.

And apparently, having to watch something romantic or heart-warming is the equivalent of having to watch people get maimed and tortured. As in, you don't want to see Apocalypto, so I'm not going to see Pursuit of Happyness. Which, let's face it, is really just a way to completely get out of seeing The Holiday.

Except, these two things are not the same at all. What it's really about is using the limits of my ability to compromise to get out of seeing a film he's not totally into. That sucks.

Some women will go see certain films only with their friends. Partner won't go, so it's off with the circle of friends. If this works for you, more power to you. And obviously, not everyone is as into film as I am.

But I guarantee you that if I was that kinda girl, I'd be married right now.

I don't like film noir, but I'll go see it. Not a huge fan of quite a lot of films that I would willingly and happily go see with a significant other. I do this with my friends, and it's never a problem. We compromise. We take turns.

I want to be with someone who'll go with me to a variety of movies. Who's open to seeing a variety of movies. Personally, I've often considered someone else's interest in a film to be an excellent excuse to go see something I otherwise wouldn't have.

So the question is, going to the movies with your partner:  Is it a dealbreaker?  Or is it just a movie?


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