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« January 2007 | Main

From Lovers to Friends

I’ve done it so many times.

And certainly, I’m hoping a relationship sticks one of these days, but I’m also glad to have the kinda friends that ex-boyfriends can make – really, really good ones.  Full of intimacy meshed with a male point of view and great hugs.  It truly can’t be beat if you’re looking for a cohort.

Continue reading "From Lovers to Friends" »

Have Sex & Save Money!

I’m an armchair psychologist.

Seriously, it was close to being my major in college and to this day I still enjoy the mechanics of how the human mind works. In fact, the more I study and read and people-watch, the more I’m convinced that there are actually very few human motivations and that these motivations – fear being the most common, directly affect your sex life.

Take cheap people for example. I’ve been certain for many years that people who huddle around a nickel like its the second coming are only sublimating for something else they’re not getting. To illustrate, one of my ex-boyfriends, Dan, was so cheap (cue: “How Cheap Was He?”) that he’d saved every receipt for everything he’d ever bought in case it would need to be taken back to the store. The man makes six figures, but when I asked him how he could take a vacuum cleaner that Hoover doesn’t even make anymore back to the store for a refund, it was crystal clear that this had nothing to do with saving money. This was sexual frustration masked as frugality. Was it any surprise that this “man” couldn’t keep it up for more than 30 seconds?

Same goes for people who separate the two-ply toilet paper, horde spare change, drive ten miles out of the way rather than pay tolls and/or mooch off their friends. I would never crack on anyone who actually needs to pinch pennies or clip coupons because they’re struggling; I’m talking about those who have cash who’d rather die than to let a few dollars go for the sake of pleasure or comfort.

But there is a remedy. Women’s Health just published an article called “The Cost…Of Not Having Enough Sex.” This article calculates down to the penny, how much you can save this year by getting laid instead of buying some of the more commonly used household staples like Advil, Movies OnDemand, even your regularly scheduled therapy appointment.

Let me know what you’re hording. Perhaps I can be of help. You’re welcome on my couch anytime. Well until my next boy toy arrives anyway.

Love Hurts.

Sometimes, I find myself thinking about the various ways men have hurt me over the years.

Sometimes, I feel like I can't bear to feel - even once more -the slightest slight.  I question if I have the strength, even when I know the reward is wonderful, wonderful, wonderful, and yet again, wonderful.

I believe in love and marriage and partnership and passion and connection, and I really, truly do want it and believe it can happen. But I honestly question, sometimes, how much more my heart can take.

Continue reading "Love Hurts." »

You’d Better Behave Yourself!

I’ve always believed that everyone seems just a little too proper. I think we can all benefit from loosening the restrictions and letting it all hang out, so to speak. You get to know people faster that way. Take dating, for example. If it takes weeks to get all the formality out of the way so you can really get to know the other person, then you realize that person really wasn’t worth your time, what was the purpose of all the preliminary posturing?

Well, my freelance writing peer and style expert Caroline Tiger disagrees. She’s recently released another installment in her How to Behave book series called How To Behave: Dating and Sex. It appeared in my inbox through a Daily Candy article. Caroline believes some of us need a little help when faced with the conundrums of online dating, kicking someone out of your bed (or life) the morning after and hearing the L-word when not feeling it yourself (I recently lived through this one).

Perhaps you need a little guidance when navigating through murky dating waters. Following ones instincts doesn’t work for everybody, I guess. Some people get off on following the rules just like I get off on nice hands, a great kiss and a well-formed penis. What I think this really is about is not having the confidence to do what you want. Everyone’s looking for tips. We all want a map to follow.

What will we do when we finally learn that no map is correct? Well, until then, mind your manners and learn from Ms. Tiger how to behave.

Girl on Top Sex

According to sex researcher Beverly Whipple, coauthor of The Science of Orgasm, girl on top positions are the all time best positions for women reaching orgasms. The reasoning is that with you on top, you get to direct the pace and depth of penetration. In addition to that, his member is directly rubbing against not only your clitoris but your g-spot as well. Your hands get to be rubbing all over his body driving him wild, and at least one of your greatest assets (your boobs and your butt) are in his line of sight.

It's a total bossy move, you are in control and it's guaranteed to drive him wild (especially when you flip it to reverse cowgirl to have him stare at your sexy butt instead).

The only few drawbacks from girl on top positions are that:

  1. You are the one working it: For a few minutes, you might be able to handle this position--but if you are out of shape, it's going to be obvious that you are once you hit the 5 minute stretch. Your thighs start burning and you start breathing harder...and it gets uncomfortable and you lose your groove. The best way to handle this is to lean forward and put some of your body weight on your arms (just like the guys do). Be sure to work those thighs and legs out when you hit the gym to build your muscular endurance. In addition, have him thrust from below to decrease the amount of energy you are exerting. Try bumping and grinding against him instead of thrusting, it's just as effective and doesn't burn your thighs as much. Lean forward or backward to rest your quads while thrusting---a little angling goes a long way.
  2. You might get self conscious: Okay, I know not all of us can totally lose our inhibitions in the boudoir and this is where riding dirty might get dicey. Instead of concentrating on what he thinks of your chubby thighs, rounded belly, orgasm face and flopping breasts focus instead on reaching your multiple orgasms and driving him wild. He's just happy to be seeing you NAKED and he loves the fact that you are riding him---in fact, he's not noticing any of those things at all. So stop denying your own pleasure by focusing on them.

To spice up this awesome move, feel free to whip out your vibrator and slip it into the mix. The reverberations add to the sensations on both of you and takes it to a whole new level. Play with yourself, or encourage him to play with you. Don't forget to keep thrusting/bumping even when your orgasm hits, remember, you are the one in control here. It would totally suck if you were orgasming and then stopped before you hit the plateau.

So---what's stopping you? Climb on top of him tonight.

Did I leave out any other tips on the girl on top position? What do you do to spice it up?

The Perfect Blowjob

Ever wondered how to give your guy the most perfect blowjob he will ever experience? One that will have him remembering you as the babe who ruled the Guinness World Book of Blowjob Records? Well, Moxie has a great post on her blog about it. It's called the Cheat Sheet and it's a list collated from tons of experienced men and women who love giving and receiving blowjobs. I've tried most of the items on the list, but even I picked up a few pointers. It's a long read but well worth it.

Remember, the most important element to the perfect blowjob is ENTHUSIASM! You have to show up, get on your knees and suck him off hard-core. Act like it's a do-or-die affair and it's the last one you will ever suck. If you aren't into blowing his socks off, he's not going to enjoy it as much. Sure, he might still cum, but that doesn't make records.

The energies to a perfect blowjob is multi-layered and directly proportional. The more you are into it, the more he enjoys it. The more he enjoys it, the more excited you get. The more excited you get, the more turned on he gets. The more turned on he gets, the more sounds he makes.The more sounds he makes, the more surge of energy you get. Having him totally at your mercy turns you on even more and leads you closer to your own orgasm. It's a win-win situation.

Anyway, head on over there and read the Cheat Sheet. It's a worthwhile read and great information to file away for future and (hopefully timely) use.

Your thoughts?

Dating Dealbreakers

I'm going to just come right out and admit this - I was floored to discover that any non-smoker would date a smoker.  I certainly don't think it's sweeping the nation, but chalk one up for romance, because these non-smoking people are out there.

Continue reading "Dating Dealbreakers" »

Chemistry, Our Fickle Mistress

That mysterious connection, that intangible thing that makes your words trip, your heart race, your mind wander:  Chemistry.  I've felt it; it's definitely real.

Yet sadly, so often it doesn't hold the meaning we wish that it would.  Even as sometimes it does.

Continue reading "Chemistry, Our Fickle Mistress" »

Homophobia the "Hard-Away"

Sometimes you trick yourself into thinking that when it comes to sexuality, people aren't as ignorant as they used to be. And then, you wake up to the news that a pro-athlete has publicly made a disgustingly offensive homophobic remark.

Continue reading "Homophobia the "Hard-Away"" »

Nudism Revisited! 10 Questions with Tom Mulhall, Owner of the Terra Cotta Inn, Clothing Optional Resort in Palm Springs, CA

Since I wrote my nudism blog back on January 10th I’ve gotten some replies from those who are curious, those who know and those who want me to spend some more time on the subject. Well, I spoke with the owner of a nudist resort recently, Tom Mulhall, who shed some light on this industry, its history and its future:

How Would You Introduce Yourself?
I own a nudist resort and we also belong to the Trade Association for Nude Recreation (TANR). I’m also a past president of the Palms Springs Chamber of Commerce, so I’m not just involved with nudism, but the entire tourism industry.

How Popular Is Nudism?
Well, one in seven people in Europe will visit a nude resort each year. Europeans are much more comfortable with nudity than we are in America. Nudism actually began in Europe (Europe the continent, not Great Brittain) in the late 1800’s as a medical treatment for Ricketts and the black sky effects of coal burning during the winter.

What’s Your Personal Nudism Story?
My wife, Mary Claire, and I were maybe 23 or 24 years old and were really poor recent college graduates looking to visit the original Jamaican Hedonism resort, which wasn’t like it is now. It cost only $300, round trip, including airfare, to go. We never realized they had a nude beach there. Since it was the 70s, the hippie culture was still dominant, but it took us a while to work up the nerve to try it. But once we did, we thought it was really cool, and we’ve been into it ever since.

How Has This Industry Evolved?
Now, nudism is no longer family/kid-oriented. There’s something now called “couples vacation packages.” People, especially when traveling to the Caribbean, tend to not take the kids so now there’s a huge market for resorts that can offer a different type of vacation experience. First, topless sunbathing, like at Hedonism and then at places like Club Med and Sandals became popular. This progressed to nude sunbathing becoming more popular.

What About Your Resort?
We lived in Chicago until 1994 when we moved to Palm Springs. We started buying rental buildings. I’m a CPA by background, my wife is a home economist. We’d vacationed a lot in the Caribbean and in Europe and talked about possibly opening our own clothing-optional resort at some point. We were the very first couples-oriented nude resort in the United States. We’re called the Terra Cotta Inn. We’ve now been open 12 years.

What’s the Personality Type of a Nude Sunbather?
This is for very outgoing people. And when you take your clothes off at a nude resort, you are so much better behaved. Its like bearing your body also accompanies bearing your soul. If you go and stay at a Hyatt or Hilton hotel, you never, ever make friends with people. Whereas at a nudist resorts you’re likely to make lifelong friends because you’ve really gotten to know other people.

Has Nude Sunbathing Grown In Popularity In the U.S.?
Nude recreation is really getting major press these days. I always say that once you get a major A-list celebrity who says they enjoy visiting nudist resorts, then you’ll blow the lid right off. You’ve got people like Tom Hanks, Jennifer Lopez and Jennifer Aniston who enjoy nude sunbathing or who say they enjoy going nude at home like Shakira, who gardens nude at her home in the Bahamas. Those things will always make the press. Then, everyone will want to do it.

And Personal Highlights?
When Newsweek did their article a few years ago on the best small business in America, they came here. How many people can say they’ve had their bare butt in Newsweek Magazine?


Where Should We Go for More Information?
I would suggest the American Association of Nude Recreation (AANR) for basic information, and, of course my site and blog: www.sunnyfun.com and www.terracottainn.blogspot.com

This Valentine's Day, Just Say No To Whiny Men

I'm developing a serious pet peeve.

These people and their whining about "Hallmark Holidays."  And if it's Christmas, then it's "Oh, it's all just so commercialized, wah, wah, wah."

So don't make YOUR holiday about commercial stuff!  DUH.

Continue reading "This Valentine's Day, Just Say No To Whiny Men" »

What The Hell Is Speed Dating?

I won’t clog the blog waves with yet another Valentine’s Day snore as, I’m sure, so many bloggers are wont to do today. Instead, I’ll tell you how I was invited, by a networking and social group I’m a member of, to a Valentine’s Day Speed Dating event. What the…?

The e-vite read like this:

Everyday is the 14th!

When: Valentine's Day 2007
Where: The African American Museum in Philadelphia
Time: Happy Hour (6pm to 9pm)
Price: $10 in Advance ~ $15 at the Door ~ $5 for YFS members
Why settle for 1 date on Valentine's Day when you can have 10?
Strongly Suggested Pre-Requisites for Participation:
• Ladies Must Bring A Guy Friend
• Fellas Must Bring A Lady Friend (that you're not dating…YFS is a Drama Free Organization People!)

Come Prepared to Have Fun (no uptight people allowed!)

Needless to say, I won’t be attending. As curious as I am about meeting new people and especially about watching people who are curious aim their arrows at the wrong people, I just can’t seem to wrap my brain around the concept of “dating” someone for six minutes and waiting to see if he also thought me interesting enough to see again. Because as my many years of experience with six-hour dating have taught me, about the only thing I can learn about a person in six minutes, is NOT whether I’d want a second date with them, but only if I’d want to sleep with them. Have the clubs and bars all closed?

According to New York EasyDates, “Why waste time with internet dating or blind dates? Know you like each other before you go out. New York EasyDates meet 'em before you date 'em.”

Well, duh! Isn’t the point of meeting people that you like what you see, and then move on to the phone call, then go out on a date? Remember that? Have we forgotten? What the hell is going on?


This crap even has a page on Wikipedia, the place for everything that’s anything in our culture, proof that its legit.

I even put a call out on my MySpace.com page telling the first 10 people who could relay to me their experiences on a speed date that they’d get a shot at reading their reply in this blog. No takers.

Get a life!

Insecure Relationships Affect Your Health

with a sample size of 61 healthy women showed a link between attachment ability and your immune system. The researchers found that "those who had difficulty establishing close, trusting relationships showed signs of weaker immune function. Specifically, lab experiments showed that the women's "natural killer" immune system cells were less lethal compared with those from other study participants."

It doesn't mean that being in an insecure relationship will kill you---but it does negatively affect your health. See insecurity leads to you being stressed. And chronic stress affects your immunity because it compromises your body's ability to fight infection. Your body's natural killer cells don't pep up when they are attacked because they are depressed.

The researchers also found a direct link between certain health problems and women who had attachment issues. These include plaque psoriasis, a condition where scaly patches form on the skin, and alopecia areata, an autoimmune disorder that causes hair loss. Ugh!

So in a nutshell, in order to further improve your health, stay out of relationships that have you feeling insecure. The right relationship for you should yield more endorphins and good energy than stress, negative emotions and sadness. Keep your head up.

Do you see any correlation between the two? Have you noticed a decline in your health in the past when you were in a stressed out relationship like migraines, colds and the like? Do share.

You can read the article in it's entirety HERE.

Living Life and Falling in Love

I recently came across a new dating website called Lifeknot. You are probably wondering...why would someone start a new dating website when there are a bajillion other dating websites out there like Match, EHarmony & Myspace that have already cornered the market?

Well, the people at Lifeknot have come up with a really interesting niche. They believe that you should just live your life and pursue it to the fullest extent of happiness and love will follow. It's based on the premise that when you pursue your hobbies, interests, lifestyle and beliefs, you will eventually find someone that shares one of your interests and this creates an instant bonding platform. According to their user friendly website:

"Online dating sites rush people into the relationship stage of a friendship and social networking sites link you to so many people that the intimacy of establishing a few close friends is lost. Lifeknot’s combination of personal and activity profiles strikes the perfect balance between the two.

Lifeknot members frequently suggest new activities as they seek people that share their interests and passions–passions as diverse as sled dog racing, sushi, scrabble, sailing, shiatsu, hiking, home brewing, horseback riding, biking, beekeeping, body surfing, and belly dancing to name a few.

Lifeknot Activity Profiles permit people to show a side of themselves that isn't conveyed through traditional personality profiles alone. As a result, people feel more comfortable contacting each other; activities shared serve as icebreakers and provide the reassurance that interests are other than skin deep."

The website has over 1200 activities that people are enrolled for. The best part is that it's totally FREE! You can find activities in your area, or try activities while in another city. There are over 1200 categories and they are all user suggested. Which means if you don't find something that fits you, you can also make your own clique. How cool is that?

If I were single, this would be one avenue that I would give a whirl. So here's to all my lovely singletons---try it out and let me know what happens. You will probably have the time of your life!

What to Expect When You're A Valentine

Tomorrow morning I will be appearing on the Today Show to talk about Valentine's Day Expectations. When I was first asked, "How should women manage their expectations on Valentine's?", I wanted to blurt out (humorously of course), "Don't have any!"

Continue reading "What to Expect When You're A Valentine" »

Are People Really Still Smoking?

Seriously - It's 2007, and it's getting to the point where smoking is just plain crazy.  It's killing you; it's totally disgusting; and it's not OK.

Yes, this is a post about relationships.  It's a post about relationships with smokers.

Continue reading "Are People Really Still Smoking?" »

Over One Million Served...

All of us at The Sexy Smart blog are committed to perpetuating positive messages about women’s sexuality and promoting sexual health. And we need some positive news; it has really been bleak these days. In the United States, 7 out of 10 sexual acts happen without a condom and 65 million Americans have an incurable sexually transmitted infection.

Continue reading "Over One Million Served..." »

Gameboy

Where are the women who make up this thirty percent of female gamers? Show yourselves! I have a few questions for you.

A few years ago for my birthday, I received the Namco Plug & Play system for my television. It has five of the old Atari joystick games, including Ms. Pacman, my favorite, and plugs right into my TV. I love it. Its no addiction certainly, but I do enjoy zoning out and unwinding with it from time to time.

Well according to Women’s Health Magazine, gaming can also help your sex life. Really now?

I’ve been reading about these tech addictions and how they’re destroying marriages and how porn on the internet is a silent killer among once-tight couples. But this article found a loophole: you must play along with your game boy (some crap about bonding and learning to problem solve as a team).

Anyhoo…this may be fun and certainly more healthy than going along with a wife swap or a cocaine binge, so it may be worth a try.

Star Wars II: The Original Trilogy could be interesting as you’d get to play Princess Leia to his Luke Skywalker. I say make him play Leia. Impersonate underground agents with Tom Clancy’s Splinter Cell Chaos Theory. Or, you can get really physical with the new Nintendo Wii system. My friend Mickey is doing a Wii Sports Experiment to lose weight, but he and his girlfriend could just as soon use it to inspire working up a sweat in some other ways.

Tell me ladies, which are your favorite games? Do you play any of them with your boyfriends or husbands? If you could create a game of your own, with the purpose of getting some sexual stimulation from it, what would it be?

Check out the Women’s Health article HERE.

Why Some Nice Guys are Creepy

Scared Bunny wrote a really great post on his thoughts on nice guys and why a huge population of them usually end up getting screwed. I tend to stay away from nice guys---not because of the 'Bad Boy' syndrome but because I'm too opinionated for my own damn good and end up walking all over the garden variety of nice guys. I'm not saying that nice guy = wuss but I'm saying that if a nice guy had an edge to him, and some cajones then he would have a better chance with the average girl.

Continue reading "Why Some Nice Guys are Creepy" »

National Singles Awareness Day

Valentine's Day is right around the corner...a day reserved for nauseatingly sweet romantic gestures, wedding proposals and expensive over-the-top gifts in red, pink and white. Even though I'm a huge romantic, I'm not really big on commercialized holidays and Valentine's day is no exception. Every year, whether I'm in a relationship or out of one, I make it a point not to do anything special that day--just in protestation for all the 120,384,839 gazillion couples who will be filling up restaurants, clubs, bars and hotels to the point of insanity.

You have 356 days in the year to show your significant other that you love them...why not take advantage of any or all of those? Why not choose a day that is truly special to the both of you, say an anniversary of your first kiss, first date, first time making love, etc.--and not a day that some old monk got executed? Since when did Hallmark dictate to us all the holidays in the year?

One of my dearest bloggettes, the Overeducated Nympho has similar thoughts as well. She calls it the National Singles Awareness Day (NSAD) and it seems that there are alot of Singletons who have pretty much the same mindset.

One week from tomorrow is N.S.A.D. That means all the married/coupled women in my office will receive huge bouquets of flowers and singing heart telegrams (one can only hope for such embarrassment to rain down on their big fat freakin ray of sunshine), and all the men will look hopeful in anticipation of getting some that night.

Me? I have a soccer game. And that is all. It’s co-ed soccer… maybe I can kick some cute guy in the crotch and then take him home with me under the promise of “I’ll make it all better.” Ha! I almost choked on my own evil brilliance.

If you are a huge V-day fan, more power to you. Just remember that there are 8736 more hours in a year to show your darling love that he/she is truly your hearts joy.

Winning Is An Aphrodisiac

Who cares about the Super Bowl anymore?

I watch every year. I’m a huge sports fan, I’m a football fan, and I like to check out the major sporting events because I am a fan and also because I’m a pop culture junkie who can’t help but make connections between what’s happening in the news and how it shapes us as a society.

For example, we’re still making racial history through sport. This Super Bowl was the first in American history to feature a Black head coach. Two, in fact. I also thought it interesting that most sports reporters who elaborated on this fact also seemed to need to apologize for approaching the subject by suggesting there will be a day when this topic won’t be relevant (no, there won’t).

But another subject that intrigues me about the big game and all the hoopla and pageantry surrounding it is the heightened sense of urgency, all the anticipation of the “big” moment and how sexually charged that all is.

Now, I’m not one of those women who get all gooey and orgasmic over chocolate. I also gossip very little, which many women use like lifeblood to stay connected to the world. I do like my shoes and I believe a quality massage never hurt anybody, but for me, one of my passion pursuits will always be pro sports. And I’m not the only one. Football wives and locker room groupies have a different agenda than I, who will always hold the game in higher esteem than the players’ marital status, however, the groupies and the “scope queens” have their place, and the Super Bowl is their biggest arena.

I remember back in the late 80s when I was still a teenager, The San Francisco 49ers won one of their Super Bowls with Joe Montana, their quarterback, being lifted ever higher into the ranks of studliness. I was working at a video store with lots of people my ages, and as we sports fans relived each great play of the game and debated where this one placed on the list of the greatest sports moments in history, most of the girls could only comment on how they wanted to be married to Joe Montana.

Okay. Whatever.

But it does make an interesting point. Where do you think all these paternity suits come from? Why are all those silicone-enhanced, sport-knowledge-deficient hoochies hanging around during and after games? How come the Super Bowl is just as much about hookers and “flesh and flash” parties as it is about the final score? And why do blogs, like the NFL Wives Club, exist?

I’ll tell you why. Because winning is an aphrodisiac!

How to Break Up.

At lunch with a friend a day after my most recent break-up, the topic of hurting people came up. I was explaining that my ex-boyfriend and I were going to do the friend thing.

Here's a truth: If the absolute first person you ever date in your entire life isn't your one and only soulmate who you then stay with until the day you die, you are going to spend time being hurt and hurting others. In a break-up, one or both of you is hurt.

Continue reading "How to Break Up." »

Was Harry Right?

Can men and women really be friends? That's the question I was asked on The Today Show last week. You know what I said?

Continue reading " Was Harry Right?" »

Ask about STDs.

I was thinking about my recent break-up - because he treated me right.  And I was thinking that while half of it is: Good Guy; there's another half that's: Hey, Communicated and Stood Up For My Needs.  And that made me think about STDs.

Yes, it's a winding path, my stream of consciousness.

Continue reading "Ask about STDs." »

Sex Toy of the Month February: Super Stretch!

How many of us have nearly sprained our wrists trying to give a quality hand job to a guy who takes forever? Or better yet, how many of us have guys who we don’t live with or see every day that we’d like to give the gift of a quality hand job when we can’t necessarily be there? That would be great, right?

Well this month’s toy solves that dilemma. Its more your wrist saver than a sex toy. Its called Super Stretch.

Its a cute silicone cylindrical sleeve that’s like a mitten over his erection and promises to feel just like the real thing. Its stretchy and tacky, has slight ribbing on the inside and is perfect for those couples who like to play with toys but hate the buzzing of the robotic, mechanical stuff. There are no batteries required for the Super Stretch.

And as the demonstrator explained, the effect is so immediate with Super Stretch, that the usual 10 minute mutual masturbation sessions that strengthened your wrists to those of pro tennis players would now be cut down to half the time! Know what this is? Its the sex aid for busy working women!

Lube is a definite requirement with the Super Stretch and its neatest feature? When you pinch the top of the Super Stretch as he orgasms, there will be no mess to clean up!

And no…the Super Stretch was not manufactured by the company that makes the Swiffer products.

Foreplay

There was an article I read in last month's Cosmopolitan that got me thinking more about foreplay.

When dating, foreplay is one of the mainstays of the dating relationship. However, once the relationship progresses to a long term committed relationship, foreplay is one of those things that invariably swings out the window. After all, you are both comfortable with each other now, know your spots and know what works yielding an orgasm in 20 minutes or less. So why bother with a lengthy foreplay session?

First of all, not only does foreplay totally get your juices revving, it also increases the passion when you actually have sex. It's like building a bonfire, first you start with an ember, which grows into a dull flame, a bright flame which grows into a blazing bonfire. Foreplay is that first spark, the ember.

There are oodles of ways to initiate foreplay without even going the more common routes of first, second and third base. Any subliminal message, even a subtle one is enough to send his mind in overdrive and his blood heading straight downwards.

A look, a touch, a seductive smile. A note tucked in the pocket of his suit. A kiss in the mirror after applying fresh lipstick for an instant imprint of your lips everytime he looks at the mirror.

In my book, the best foreplay is the kind that lasts all day long....

Do you agree or disagree that foreplay tends to slip away the longer you are in a relationship? Your thoughts please.

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